Flightless, Lifeless
by Cat488
Summary: The boy slowly took his mask off. He had failed them. All of them. And in that moment, Robin, Dick, and everything that he was, fell apart, like a flightless bird in the night sky, falling, falling.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, YJ Fandom. First time writing YJ fanfic ;) I was inspired by everyone on this website and the show itself. Hopefully, this is okay. My writing style changed again and now its kinda unstable, as I haven't written in a LONG time. Any criticism is welcomed (: Please let me know if the characters become OOC! I hate it when that happens :C Although, please note that the characters are very…depressing, especially in this story. Let me know if you think the rating should change. I'm not exactly sure where I want to take this story just yet… so rating can change at any time.**

This was it.

This was finally, fucking it.

The boy laid there, eyes staring blankly at the wall in front of him through his thin mask.

No, it wasn't.

But it might as well have been.

The coward's way out, he knew. But still. If only it were so.

It would have been better if it was.

But it wasn't.

It was so much worse.

He had always known the possibility. At the back of his mind, he had always known the risks. You couldn't fully be a hero without knowing the risks, especially when you were a human one. And being one among the few mortal heroes these days, he was constantly being reminded. He had known of all the dangers, having come face to face with so many, and yet, it had not been enough.

As logical as the boy was, he was still a teenage superhero who more or less thought he was invincible. He wasn't naïve, and he definitely wasn't stupid. But drilled into his brain was the innocent belief that his mentor would always come in and safe the day, and that when it came down to it, what he and his team did was worth it. _Justice_ was worth it.

Death had never scared him. Not his own death, anyway. He had truly believed that when the day came, he would be ready for it. He had always assumed that he would fall fighting. Fall proud. Fighting side by side with his mentor, his teammates, his friends. No, he had always known; expected, even.

And yet, nothing had gone the way it was supposed to.

It just wasn't _fair_.

He shouldn't have expected as much. Nothing in his life had been fair before, after all. His entire family killed? The days at that orphanage? The entire Gotham city was built on unfairness. If it weren't for Bruce, for Batman, he didn't think he'd be who he was today. He could have ended up as a criminal; a _killer_, even. The boy shuddered. The only thing good, only thing that was fair that had ever come out of his overall life was Batman. Him and the Young Justice League, who had taught him friendship, and love, in a way Bruce never could have. They had shown him open affection, something he had never known. And to him, that made everything worth it. They, along with Bruce and Alfred, were worth all the unfairness in his life. It was one of the only two reasons the boy lived for.

The second reason, well, that was something else. The unlimited possibilities in the sky, the millions of things he had never seen, the feeling when he flipped and tumbled through the air, the breath-taking rush as he flew above all else; that was the second reason. And the_ knowledge,_ the knowledge that he _helped_ people doing the things he loved with those he loved even more. That made everything okay. It always had. It was always supposed to.

God, how would they react? Would they still care? Would they still want to?

Would they still want _him_?

The boy held back a sob.

What if they didn't want him?

He combed his hair mindlessly with his hand.

Nothing mattered anymore.

He could not do what he had been naturally gifted to do. He could no longer twirl and dance in the sky, as if he were flying. He could no longer do any of those things.

He could no longer be Robin.

He was no used to them now. He couldn't be Batman's protégé. He couldn't be a member of the Young Justice League. He couldn't be a superhero.

He couldn't be Robin.

Who was he then? Dick Grayson? No, Dick Grayson was an acrobat too. He couldn't even do that. He couldn't even be that.

He was _useless_.

Useless.

Handicapped.

A _failure_.

The boy slowly took his mask off.

He had failed them. All of them.

Failed his family.

Failed the team.

Failed Batman.

Failed Robin.

And in that moment, Robin, Dick, and everything that he was, fell apart, like a flightless bird in the night sky, falling, falling.

_Falling._

**Well? Comments? Criticism? Anything? I love reviews, they make me happy (: I'll let you know that its not as bad as it sounds. Robin's condition, I mean. The story will switch to a lighter tone soon, since this is like a prologue thing. Anyways, hope you guys like it! This is kind of to A) experiment and work on my writing and B) to fill in this LACK OF YJ. WHY ARE THERE NO NEW EPISODES? I just started watching during the winter break and immediately fell in love. And now I'm done. And I'm in desperate need for more. I know they're on hiatus, but could they please just hurry up? :C Yeah, so I'm trying to fill my INCOMPLETENESS with this story, as well as reading everyone else's fanfiction. Any fic recs would be lovely. Mainly on Robin, please. Cuz, as you all know, he's amazing. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Here we go again (: Enjoy! **

_Two days ago_

"KF!" Too late, he was gone. God, his best friend was an idiot.

"You idiot! Get back here!"

Apparently, someone agreed with him. Not that that was a surprise or anything. They were talking about KidFlash, after all.

"He can't ever just stick with the plan, can he?" Artemis groaned.

Sticking with the plan was never KF's strong suit. In his defense, though, they didn't really have much of a plan to begin with.

Robin looked over to Kaldur, who was silent, looking like he was lost in thought. Kaldur had been questioning his leading abilities ever since the incident. _The incident_. Robin was sympathetic. He was, really. Like he had told Black Canary, he no longer wished to be leader. Leadership came with burdens that Robin had enough of already, thank you very much. He knew Kaldur felt responsible for their failure, but the fact was that he was wrong. Yeah, it's true that he shouldn't have sacrificed himself. Leaders couldn't always afford to be noble; they had to think of everything, for everyone. He had learnt that from Batman. But having a heart wasn't a crime, especially not when you were sixteen years old. And _even_ if you considered that to be a mistake, the exercise was designed for inevitable failure. There was nothing anyone could have done. And, if _someone _were to be blamed, well, then it would be him. _Robin_ was the one who had led everyone to their doom, after all. And though the thirteen year old was more logical than any thirteen year old should be and knew deep inside that he wasn't to be blamed for their failure, the event had led to restless nights plagued by worries of future failures; failures that seemed inevitable at the moment.

But, like everything that troubled him during the job, it went to the back of his head until the mission was over. That, Robin knew, was what made him a better leader than Aqualad. In a way that he knew Aqualad could never do, or want to do, Robin could push his negative emotions into a closet and just, lock it. That was how he could be so carefree in the face of tragedy. That was how he could be so calm in the face of danger. That was how he dealt with everything, at least during a mission, anyway. He was perfectly okay with showing such emotions afterwards. After all, he_ had_ opened up to Black Canary. But it would always be mission first, issues later. _Batman lesson number one_.

"Aqualad?" M'gaan asked quietly, waiting for direction.

The Atlantian raised his head, as if realizing that he was supposed to take charge.

"Let's catch up to KidFlash, before he gets himself into trouble." Aqualad signaled. Robin smiled. _Better. _

"Again." The team grinned.

Other than the tension from the incident, (gosh he needed to name the event. He was sick of calling it "_the incident_". It made it sound worse than it was…) that was slowly fading as well, thanks to Black Canary, the team seemed to be in a relatively light mood, which was a first in quite a while now.

They were, as usual, chasing villains, saving the word, etc, etc. It had been a while since they had been on a mission, though. In fact, this was really the first real one they had had since that screwed up "exercise" (understatement of the _year_). The league had been pretty worried about sending them out, and they were probably right to be. Everyone was _still_ stepping on eggshells, even though it had already been a week. And even now after they had finally been deemed fit enough for the field (not him though. Batman had been wary, but Robin had started patrolling in Gotham two days after the incident), they were still being given ridiculously simple missions. Right at the moment, a couple of super villain wannabes had escaped prison in Central City. Not exactly great exciting mission material, but Robin had learned a long time ago to take what he could get, and he knew the team's limits well enough not to complain. After all, Kaldur was not the only one who had been having issues.

Speaking of issues, he had one right now. Where the hell was KF?

"Superboy, see anything?" Aqualad spoke.

"Nothing ye – no wait, two blocks down, on the roof of that old bakery. He's got them cornered." Superboy sounded impressed.

Show off.

The five of them started running towards the speedster. They'd have to talk to him – again, about sticking to the plan. Not that Robin was any better at it.

Things were finally starting to look up. No bumps on this simple outing meant bigger missions later on. The team thing was starting to work again too. Okay, he was being a bit optimistic here, but everyone's issues were bound to smooth out eventually. Robin was finally feeling a bit more whelmed.

"Guys, he's going to fall! He's – he's falling!"

Right.

No bumps? Funny.

They picked up their pace.

Optimism? Completely overrated.

**Reviewww please ~ ! They make me very happy. Just a comment or two ; you know, what you liked, what you didn't like, (: **


End file.
